Take Me As I Am

Take me as I am, 'cause I'm going,
I was too scared to start,
And now I'm too scared to let go.
Take me as I am, 'cause I'm growing,
But it's so hard to tell
When I'm not used to this so....FM Static

On the long drive home from Brentwood tonight, I heard this song again. We were heading back from Spencer's doctor appt. with his doctor. It has been a loooonnnnnngggg day. I was totally depleted to be honest--I got up at 5:15, taught 20 elated boys/girls on the 100th day of school(That is a very exciting day.), drove across town to Brentwood for the appt, went to hunt for party supplies with Natalie for her birthday party, and then finally heading back home from Brentwood. I heard the tune (#2 on my playlist at the bottom) and my heart cheered up. I LOVE this song!!! It's so me. If you've read my husband Trevis' letter about our adoption, you'll know why we were hesitant to adopt. Now that we're in, I'm too scared to let go! God is so good. He is teaching me and molding me. I am not always the best clay--ha! I do have a new expectancy with God. I am really counting on Him to be faithful. It's scary and exhilerating all at once.

Saturday night, our new sermon series was titled, "unwavering". Wow! That says it all.....Unwavering. I've really begun to think about it. I am quite the waverer if that is such a word. I have realized that it is an hour by hour decision to consecrate my mind...I do need Him all the time. I am learning to extend grace to myself too when I'm not the best mom, wife, teacher, or friend I could be.
I'm also learning that it's one thing to have "head" knowledge of something and an entirely different thing to walk it out. This is where I think most of us meet our challenge.

God is faithful though. He is really moving on the hearts of His people. I am so thankful....My blog friend and mom from the school I teach at told our story and linked our blog to hers. She has been a blessing. My volunteer buddy from WOC from 1 1/2 years ago sent a sweet hand-made card and a mom that has a child in Natalie's class brought me a card today. Both had donations toward our adoption. I also had our first order for flip flops (They turned out so cute!)......I am so thankful for every person God is bringing into our lives to encourage us in our walk.. We are getting closer to our first big check we need to submit with our Orientation packet. I have all the documents notarized and ready as soon as we receive the remainder of what we need for this first go round.

I have a prayer request....Trevis and I meet with our social worker tomorrow afternoon at her office. She will be coming to our home on Thursday, so we'll be having back to back visits. We are excited to meet her and to give her all of our documents we have been collecting. (I feel like the documents are part of the family-ha!) Just pray for peace and that we'll all be relaxed.

Have a wonderful Wednesday!